


Moon River

by LadyMarmalade



Category: Tales of Xillia 2
Genre: AU, Incest, M/M, Xillia 2 Spoilers, kresnikcest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2015-03-18
Packaged: 2018-03-13 05:10:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 2,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3369041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyMarmalade/pseuds/LadyMarmalade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of shorts, all Kresnikcest. Requests are welcome, though they may not be filled out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Ashes of Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> I keep thinking, "What would happen if Julius told Ludger the truth about his mother?" Then this happened.

"Breakfast?" Julius sniffs the air and gives a half-hearted smile. "What is it today?"

Ludger doesn't answer. It's the second week he keeps his back turned to him and the sick feeling at the pit of his stomach rises to his throat again. Julius expected as much. He's happy to find Ludger still hasn't left or runaway even when there was every reason to.

Wordlessly, he sets a plate on the table and turns away to leave.

He isn't sure what he expects when he grabs his arm and turns him around, but the heartbreak in Ludger's eyes was more than enough. Ludger jerks his arm free and Julius is more than fine with letting him go back to his room with a soft grunt.

Julius stares down at the tomato omelettes. He just wishes Ludger would stop caring.


	2. Dancing Juice

Julius turned his face. His nose scrunched up at the strong stench of alcohol and cigarette smoke that had stuck to Ludger. He didn't remember him being this heavy the last time he had carried him. Then again, he thought, the last time he had carried him was when he was eight.

"Hey, I wanna do something stupid."

He paused. He was ready to lecture him on the spot about having already  _done_ something stupid but Ludger took the opportunity to regain his balance and firmly planted his feet on the ground. Proudly, he crossed his arms. Beautiful as the night sky was, Julius was cold and sleepy. He frowned and urged Ludger to continue walking, but the other only shook his head.

He supposed there was no real harm in humoring him if it got him moving. "What is it-"

Ludger pressed a finger to Julius's lips. "Will you marry me?"

It had to be drunken behavior. He couldn't mean that. “Alright, let’s get you home. Right now.”

“Say it.”

Julius sighed. The sooner he said it, the sooner they would both be home. “Yes, I will marry you."

Ludger leaned forward. He was inexperienced and his drunken state only made it more obvious. He sloppily kissed his lips, thought it would be far more accurate to say he kissed the corner of his mouth. Julius couldn't help but chuckle. "Can we go home now?"

With a satisfied nod, he swung an arm over Julius's shoulders and continued home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was planning on angst but then Bruno Mars came up on my playlist.


	3. A Thousand Miles

Ludger stared out of the car window, realizing there wasn’t anything to actually stare at. Why he and Julius had agreed to visit family that they didn’t care for or really wanted to see who, on top of that, lived an entire day out of Trigleph, was beyond either of them. The road to get there was littered by sandy and dry plains who, in return, were only decorated by bundles of dry twigs he supposed were shrubs.

For what seemed like the hundredth time that day he changed the radio station. The DJ went on about some sort of car advertisements before announcing the next song. “A classic! I’m sure all you Elympions out there will be glad to hear this one!”

A familiar piano tune began and Ludger felt the color drain from his face. Had he bothered to turn, he would notice Julius had noticeably tensed. He gulped loudly and cursed under his breath.

No. He would not give in to the devious temptations of that song. Julius would mock him for weeks about it. He had the will power to resist.

Julius, on the other hand, did not.

"And I need you?" he began in an uncertain tone as he glanced to his side.

Ludger smiled. He made a motion with his hands, mimicking a piano. “And I miss you!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted this on my blog after reading a prompt about an OTP singing A Thousand Miles. I planned on keeping it there but I felt something a little nonsensical is good for a drabble compilation too. Right?


	4. slow dance

Julius hesitates to speak. It’s too quiet in their apartment but he’s sure that even if it weren't, the lump in his throat would still be there.

"Is something wrong?"

There’s a selfish pain in his heart that tries coaxing him into shutting up. They would both be happier if he walks away now, it says. But he’s determined. He swallows but realizes his mouth feels just as dry.

"I…"

The blood is pounding in his ears and his heart only quickens its pace. It's so loud he's sure Ludger can hear it too. He wishes he would stop looking so worried.

"I killed your mother."

"Wh..." He smiles. It's not natural. It's followed by just as unnatural sounding laughter. "What are you talking about?"

"When you were five years old, I found you both by pure chance. She thought I was... She thought I was trying to harm you. And I..."

Ludger stands so quickly the dinner table shakes. His brows are furrowed together and he's on the edge of crying, Julius imagines. He doesn't have it in him to look him in the eye. It's pathetic and he knows it. He should look up and face the consequences, he owes Ludger that much.

When he does, all that greets him is the sound of a door slamming shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep naming chapters after the songs I listen to when I write them. It's misleading at times, I realize, but I don't know what else to name them.
> 
> This one is a bit rushed. I felt bad for not updating recently and I wanted to try my hand at this. I don't 100% like it, even though I rewrote it a handful of times.


	5. Promise

Julius dropped onto the couch with a tired sigh. His head hung back and his eyes were shut tightly. He had trouble finding the catalyst and after wasting what felt like a good three hours, he finally decimated the entire town. He was lucky the place was small; Just a few days ago the catalyst had been located in Trigleph and that had taken him a good day's worth of work. Lucky for him, Rideux had called in sick that day. At the very least, he was still in the lead.

"Brother..?"

Ludger stood before him, nervously fidgeting his hands behind his back. Had he run out of clean clothing? No, Julius had the laundry taken care of Monday when the house cleaning service stopped by, he thought quietly to himself. He straightened himself up on the couch and it was then that he noticed Ludger was avoiding eye contact with him. The kid was too shy for his own good.

"What is it?"

"I made food."

He paused. Had he just said the words "made" and "food" in the same sentence? Julius was fairly sure seven year olds weren't the types to know how to cook. Hell, he was fifteen and didn't know what most of the things in their kitchen were good for. "You cooked?"

Ludger nodded and scampered off into the kitchen. With a groan he pushed himself off the couch. His legs were sore and his back wasn't faring all that better. It was worth seeing just what he had "made," exactly.

It was a heaping plate of pasta. It was fairly simple, maybe something even he could have managed, Julius thought before admitting to himself that even this was beyond his level of skill. "Did you get hungry while I was gone?"

If that was the case, he'd have to arrange for someone to drop something off while he was gone. He could always leave numbers and some money for the kid to order himself something to eat. He'd probably appreciate that a lot more than having to go through the trouble of cooking.

But Ludger only shook his head. He poked at his own plate with his fork, stirring the sauce and pasta together. "I made it for you. You always look tired and teacher said food made at home always makes her feel better so..."

He was... worried about him? Ludger kept his hand twirling the fork around the plate and it was only then that Julius noticed the bandaids wrapped around his tiny fingers. He took a bite of the pasta. It was still a little raw in some places and the sauce was overly bland.

"It's good."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ever since reading that Kresnik clan biography, I can't let go of the idea of Julius not caring for Ludger until he shows him concern and it kills me inside.


	6. Strongly

Ludger held his right wrist with his left hand. He flexed his hand open, closed, open, then closed again. It had started to go numb. It felt cold at all times and though it still functioned, it could manage to only feel faint whispers of anything he touched. Was this another effect of their failing world? Each day it gasped for breath and clung to what little life it could maintain, usually to no avail.

His situation was no different, he mused. What had been the first to go? His sight, he was sure of it. But it was fine so long as he could still feel and hear Julius, Ludger had told the other. Then went his hearing, but he had no complaints. None of the noise their dying world made was worth listening to.

Julius took his hand and squeezed it. This is the world he chose- the decision he made, Ludger reminded himself, and even the small warmth he could just barely feel on his hand reassured him it was the right one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bad end drabble. One day I won't name these after songs or song lyrics.


	7. Remember the Good Days

"Prepare to feel the wrath of a god!"

Julius wants to tear his eyes away from the screen and ask Ludger what in the name of the Great Spirits that even  _meant_ but he's trying to get an item box and praying for a Blue Shell. He's long since lost count of how many rounds of _Mario Kart_ they've fit into a single afternoon but he knows that he hasn't won a single one.

Red Shell. He curses his luck when when falls off of Rainbow Road.  _Again_.

Right as he's ready to give up with some dignity intact Ludger's already gotten first place and he's grinning from ear to ear.

"Eggplant casserole for dinner it is!"


	8. Realism

They’re only ideas meant to entertain them when they can't sleep, something to dream of for the sake of momentary peace.

Julius whispers into his ear, warm breath tickling Ludger’s neck, about a life outside of Trigleph. A life where they could live together, unashamed and unknown. Ludger’s more logical side thinks for a moment about how unlikely that would be given circumstances, but he pushes the thoughts aside. Fantasies don’t need logic.

He goes on about a small house in some quaint village, a single bedroom for them to share, and he describes it so vividly Ludger can almost feel the fluffy pillows against his neck.

He has another coughing fit and holds Julius’s blackened left hand for support.

“Maybe in another world.”


	9. Bet My Life

Ludger’s hands were tiny, so very tiny, and they clutched the teddy bear in his arms before he fell back onto the floor.

Julius, firmly and gently, or as gently as he could manage to with his lack of experience in affection, grabbed Ludger’s hand. He dabbed a cotton ball dampened with rubbing alcohol on the small cuts and reassured the other that he would be done soon. Against his pale skin the small wounds and band-aids stood out horribly. Silently, he hoped it would the last time they looked so beaten.

When he was sixteen his hands were wet and pruned and wrinkled and bits of cat fur stuck to them. Only Ludger would bother to do the dishes before running away from home, he thought. Julius reached for the small kitten in his little brother’s hands and for a moment his fingers brushed against Ludger’s. He wondered when they started to feel so rough.

He was nineteen when Julius found himself staring at Ludger’s hands. There was no little boy who hurt himself cooking, no heartbroken teen holding a kitten with pleading eyes; only the man chopping away in the kitchen, whose hands deftly worked the knife, whose hands gently peppered in spice after spice, and Julius almost felt he should go over to see what they’re like. He pushed the thought away when Ludger called him over for dinner and he grimaced at the eggplant-themed dish of the night.

It had only been a year and so much had changed. He drank in every detail with the last few minutes of breath he had left. He was tan now, there were bags under his eyes, and Ludger looked so heartbroken Julius wasn’t sure he could remember how to smile so he smiled for him. The other’s fingers were lightly twitching. Anticipation? Ludger probably doesn’t know either. He slipped the hand into his own, amused that even now it fit perfectly with his own. The palm was rough but especially calloused where he gripped the lance tightly. The nicks and knots in his hands were too similar to his own but between each imperfection it was as soft as ever. It hurt to feel but it was better than nothing.

Julius knew what fate awaited him the moment he let go and so he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My friend made a playlist to the theme of "You threw away everything for me" and I regret having asked for it.


End file.
